I'm ready!

One of the main concepts I've realized that I need in order to succeed in college is balance.

Last year I didn't have too much of it. I was often over stressed over the inevitable.

This summer I've been trying to find balance between work and play as well as opening my mind up to things in college.

My biggest fear is to become the religious right stuck in churchiness and christianity without the Christ.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not changing drastically or becoming this crazy image of a college kid people get that are like hippie-fied. I'm going to church as regular as I can, going to bible study every week, I have great people from my small group in my life, as well as good people outside of it.

I just felt kind of like I was suppressing stuff a lot. I wasn't making the most of everyday. Just going through the motions.

I also was judging things from the outside and thinking I shouldn't participate because somehow it would affect me in the biggest possible way for the worse.

There were just certain things I had to realize were not the devil, for lack of better phrasing.

And I also think that I had to just grow into a lot of things.

I feel like I sheltered myself a lot because I was scared of losing my "virtue" or sorts.

And in that respect I wasn't living. I was bored and lonely and sad.

And now I'm happy. I'm getting out there. I'm taking pride in how I look, in how I am fearfully and wonderfully made, meeting new people...and becoming less and less fearful every day. :-)

I feel like people don't get to know the real me because I don't let them and I need to fix that.

I'm ready!